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What Your Pet Could Be Up To While You’re Away

Dog Playing Dress-UpDog Playing Dress-Up

When you head out for work each morning and say goodbye to your beloved dog, what do you think he does while you’re gone? Most pet owners don’t realize the wide variety of things that take place while they’re away.

Daniel Thiesson*, a graduate student at the University Of Elbow Creek, decided that he would base his thesis on this interesting topic. Little did he realize what he would learn as he began researching and recording the life of modern pets.

“I started by recording things that couldn’t move as much, since I was just starting out, and wasn’t really ‘into’ school anymore. I figured, hey, I can watch this goldfish swim around for a couple hours in fast-forward and still have time to watch ‘Kittenpocalypse’. So I did the recording, watched the goldfish swimming around, but then I noticed something weird… in the background, I could faintly make out my cat, and it looked like he was tap-dancing. At first, I just shrugged it off, since ‘Kittenpocalypse’ waits for no man, but after a solid hour, of recording, Mr. Whiskers* was still at it.”

Daniel* found himself consistently recording his apartment when he left for the day, and slowly stopped watching ‘Kittenpocalypse’ altogether. At one point, he started trying to talk to his cat, to ask him how his dancing was going, but quickly realized that would just be crazy.

Six months into his research, Daniel* brought on an assistant named Becca Green*. Becca* was a dog lover, and brought her miniture dachshund to stay with Daniel* while she was on vacation. “I was really excited to film her dog.” Daniel* admitted. “Even though he was just a little guy, I was confident he would do some big things. Two weeks later, I finally caught him playing poker with a few other dogs from around the complex. To this day, I still have no idea how they got into my apartment, but it was amazing to watch them. Honestly, a few of them had pretty easy tells, so I think Roger* (Becca’s* dog) might have just been stealing from them.”

Daniel* is scheduled to complete his Ph.D. in just a few short months, and his thesis, titled ‘Pets: Just Like Us’ is scheduled to hit bookstores soon after.

* Name changed for anonymity

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